Monday, April 28, 2014

Blind Communication

My watch has a little box on it that displays the day. It’s supposed to be “perpetual,” so I’ll never have to reset it for leap year. Somehow every four years it’s supposed to remember.

The problem is I can’t read it. The little box is so small and my eyes are so bad, without my reading glasses, I can only guess the date.

Communication can be the same way. All the information is there, but we aren't always equipped to process it.

As a team leader, I had a difficult conference call with some teammates. They were wounded and I couldn't understand why. I had been careful. After all, there were some things they needed to change. Why couldn't they see that?

A few days later, we all had a face to face with my boss. For the first time, they repeated back to me the words I had used. It was like someone said, “Here Jeff, put on these glasses.” Hearing my words, through their mouths, was horrifying.

I had the best intentions. I loved them, wanted what was best for them and wanted to see them thrive in ministry. But the phone, culture, history, personality and even language (though we all were speaking English) had created some “blind spots.”

The relationship was restored, but never really the same.

The problem with communication is we rarely know we need glasses. We think we’re reading things well, when we’re really walking along blindly, knocking bodies to the ground.

Have the courage to ask for feedback and the grace to ask for forgiveness. It doesn't matter how good my intentions are, without my glasses, I can’t tell you what day it is.

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