I’m impulsive. It’s not a bad trait when you want to pack up your family
and change countries, but not that helpful when you see a set of High School
lockers and think, “What would it be like to jump across the top of those?”
Decision making is less of a cost benefit analysis than it is a, “That looks like fun!” kind of thing. Years of physical, financial and emotional pain have helped beat it out of me, but it’s still in there.
So as a son, moving my family to Ecuador in 1999 it never occurred to me the impact that might have on my parents. It was where we thought God wanted us, so, “Cool, let’s go!”
Now as a dad, with boys old enough to make their own decisions and move their own directions, Mom and Dad’s sacrifice becomes much clearer to me.
With thirty more years of wisdom and experience and without the propensity to jump without thinking, they had a much better understanding of the long-term impact of the decision.
Even today, knowing the cost I would make the same decision. But the loss of relationship between my boys and their grandparents still leaves a bitter taste in my mouth.
The reason I share this with you is because, this month, missionaries from all over the world will return to the U.S. and leave their children, at college or to look for work. It’s something they may have prepared for, but you’re never really ready.
Others will participate in weddings, giving their child in marriage to someone they may never have met.
I tell you this not so you will feel sorry for them, or think they are super spiritual or anything like that. I share it only to help you understand their reality, to know better how to pray for them this month and in the future.
They are parents saying goodbye to their kids. It doesn't matter if you are the one being left or the one leaving, that’s always a hard goodbye.
Decision making is less of a cost benefit analysis than it is a, “That looks like fun!” kind of thing. Years of physical, financial and emotional pain have helped beat it out of me, but it’s still in there.
So as a son, moving my family to Ecuador in 1999 it never occurred to me the impact that might have on my parents. It was where we thought God wanted us, so, “Cool, let’s go!”
Now as a dad, with boys old enough to make their own decisions and move their own directions, Mom and Dad’s sacrifice becomes much clearer to me.
With thirty more years of wisdom and experience and without the propensity to jump without thinking, they had a much better understanding of the long-term impact of the decision.
Even today, knowing the cost I would make the same decision. But the loss of relationship between my boys and their grandparents still leaves a bitter taste in my mouth.
The reason I share this with you is because, this month, missionaries from all over the world will return to the U.S. and leave their children, at college or to look for work. It’s something they may have prepared for, but you’re never really ready.
Others will participate in weddings, giving their child in marriage to someone they may never have met.
I tell you this not so you will feel sorry for them, or think they are super spiritual or anything like that. I share it only to help you understand their reality, to know better how to pray for them this month and in the future.
They are parents saying goodbye to their kids. It doesn't matter if you are the one being left or the one leaving, that’s always a hard goodbye.
Thanks. This past summer in the U.S. was the first time I got to see my brother's young children interacting with my parents. My heart broke in a whole new way, thinking about the relationship my kids (and my parents) are missing out on. For a hundred reasons, I believe we are in the right place, but it's important to acknowledge and grieve the losses, too. - B
ReplyDeleteWell said Beth, Thank you.
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